Twisted sunshine

Twisted Sunshine

GENESIS

IT came as a surprise not the least for the RTA personnel who were stationed in Divisoria, Cagayan de Oro City that afternoon. The date was March 4, 2011. Since it was a Friday and they needed to back vehicular traffic up some four blocks in Divisoria to give way to the weekend night café, the RTA enforcers were taken aback by one annoying force of nature: rain.

Indeed it was a surprise since the PAGASA forecasters at nearby El Salvador City had already announced a sunny scenery all day long. Some forecast huh! Though grudging, the RTA enforcers dutifully did their tasks as they passed in front of me while I was enjoying my soup at Dimsum’s Diner along Tirso Neri-Pabayo. None of their murmurs invaded my ears though, I only saw their lips moving since I was inside the restaurant. As the downpour outside continued, the upbeat music inside muted the rain. Then Bonnie Bailey’s monstrous hit came to life.

♪♪Three years ago, my journey began
Chasing down with you, no plan in hand
Just your pulse, my raising guide in the dark
Just no win with conviction from the start

The moment your eyes made an introduction
I found my second value in the breath of life
Flawless to the point of being cuddly
I fell all for, your imperfections

And now it's like the weather is slightly warmer
Hands gripped together, eye to eye through the storm, yeah
I still believe in ever after, with you ♪♪

--
At about the same time twenty-three miles away from where I was – at the spacious grounds of Initao National Comprehensive High School in particular, Bonnie Bailey’s Ever After also burst through the speakers put in place along both sides of the stage. Unlike in CDO, the PAGASA anchors were precise in their scientific calculations here. Albeit somewhat cloudy, the weather in Initao this afternoon was just lovely for the show that was about to unfold: the coronation of Mr. and Miss INCHS 2011.

On cue, five handsome boys and five lovely ladies smilingly worked their way through the stage, fired up by the applause of the crowd and Bonnie Bailey’s infectious melody.

♪♪ And now it's like the weather is slightly warmer
Hands gripped together, eye to eye through the storm, yeah
I still believe in ever after, with you
Cause life is a pleasure with you by my side
And there ain't no pourin', in this rainbow weekend ride
I still believe in ever after, with you…

You are my twisted sunshine
You are my twisted sunshine ♪♪

One by one, the hopefuls introduced themselves. Pretty soon enough, it was female candidate number three’s turn. Fifteen-year-old Rej (yes that was her name) was a shy third year student in class but her determination to ace the pageant erased all that. She went up the mic and spoke up: “Ang edukasyon ang susi sa tagumpay. Magandang hapon sa inyong lahat. Ako po si Rejiann Ammor R. Maygay, ang ipinagmamalaki po ng Departamento ng Filipino!” The applause was instantaneous. Rej would go on capturing the crown of Miss INCHS 2011 that night, winning the hearts not just of the jurors but the whole INCHS community.

--

FOR several years that followed, nothing more yet would connect the lives of our dear protagonists – which are of course, Rejiann and me! We would go on living our own lives. After a prolific five-year-stint as Urban Life editor in Mindanao Gold Star Daily, I would transfer my Lifestyle section editing expertise to the slowly blossoming twin broadsheets – BusinessWeek Mindanao and Mindanao Daily News – where I also doubled as a news correspondent. After graduating from INCHS, Rej would enter a brief wild Medical Technology tertiary stint at Iligan Medical Center College before transferring as a Mass Communication stude at Liceo de Cagayan University here in CDO. Actually, it was Rej’s decision to shift to MassComm studies that caused this story to exist. By the summer of 2017, Rej and a few classmates had their internship at Sun.Star Cagayan de Oro. The task to babysit these budding journalists fell upon the hands of reporter Alwen Saliring. This is where we begin.

STARTING HERE

At exactly 6:00 a.m. on Monday (April 24, 2017), two things were simultaneously happening – a single and same text message wound its way through both my cell phone inbox and Alwen’s. It read: PDIR CAMILO PANCRATIUS P CASCOLAN TO GRACE WEEKLY FLAG RAISING AT PRO 10 AT 0800. PLEASE COME – MICHAELANGELO BUSTAMANTE, PNP PRESS CORPS

It was my habit to switch stations from Bombo to Magnum and to Pamahaw Espesyal every weekday morning so I was already awake at the time when I received the message. Alwen, who failed to put his phone on silent mode after a weekend night of soiree at Pulse, was awakened by the vibrating sound. Cussing and rolling around, he managed to get up only after two minutes had passed plus his own sheer force of will…then proceeded forwarding the text message to Rejiann. Like Alwen, Rej was about to wake up too but unlike him, she remained prim and composed, whispered a silent prayer of praise and gratitude then hit the shower.

The ceremony itself at Camp Alagar was a non-event, it was just a visit by a police official ranked below deputy director-general but Michaelangelo Bustamante (yes, the PNP Press Corps head) liked to impress. Thus, he tagged his squad of journalists along which included Alwen and me and Alwen’s intern Rej. And so there we were in the same venue inches from each other but not knowing who we were to each other yet.

STARTING NOW

Days of excitement fare no different than those of uneventfulness. And so it was just another ordinary Friday in November 22 last year when I received a text message from Misamis Oriental provincial information officer Nicole Managbanag summoning me and other local-based journalists for the quarterly presscon of a particular department at the Capitol. For that day’s briefing, it would be the turn of ECCD and the Misamis Oriental Provincial Jail.

As I silently complained while walking the steep steps leading to the Provincial Information Offce extension at the third level of the Capitol main building, in the end I was rewarded by a new yet beautifully stunning sight. The program was about to start and the emcee was this petite young lady who exudes both confidence and wit in her voice. Based from her looks, she must have been a fresh college grad. And she was stunningly attractive with her morena skin and all! All these were fleeting observations though.

After the program, snacks were distributed. In the middle of sipping my Coke, I got distracted while continually talking to one of the guests, ECCD head Lilay Ocot, so I put my bottle down. After Lilay bid goodbye, I was about to resume sipping my Coke when that petite emcee suddenly came up and said, “Sir, aha imong Coke ani?” It was then that I realized that I had put my Coke bottle down next to someone else’s while talking to Lilay. I never had time to ponder further since one second later, the petite lady herself offered back, “Ay….ako man siguro ni sir!” then proceeded downing one of the two Coke bottles placed side by side. That was that. I never had the chance to ask her name. I would find that out at a later day that her name was Rejiann.

The Christmas and New Year holidays would pass. By the second week of January, the Capitol was teeming with its yearly Kuyamis activities. One such activity was the horseshow competition at Sta. Cruz, Tagoloan. We arrived at the venue at almost noon on Saturday, January 12 and the tourney itself was already in full swing.

The improvised arena was stank with various human voices – the cheering crowd of the various teams, the barker at a stage nearby, etc. The loudest and most deafening of them all was Requim Zulita who launched his high-pitch monotonous blow-by-blow coverage over 102.3 Brigada News FM. Through the madness of it all, I recognized one lady calmly watching the galloping horses parading by. Rej’s serenity enveloped me.

IMPRINT

From that day forward, I wanted to talk to her more, know her a little better. Then the Cebu Pacific Flight 387 commemoration in Gingoog City came up. It was another Saturday, February 2. We finally had our first selfie. 

INITIATE

Valentine’s Day, February 14, 2019. Tagoloan Dome. IKNB Day

10:00 a.m. Everybody around was busy – the PIO team, the journalists present, practically the whole Capitol machinery. Nope…no break here. Never mind that it was the Day of Hearts. Certainly not here, not now.

IT was not until almost a week later on Monday, February 18 that my belated Valentine gift was handed to her. The weeks that followed seemed like a haze. Obviously, she knew that I like her and obviously, she was uneasy about that because her spiritual orientation was anchored on a principle that closeness between two individuals must be guided by the One and Only Creator of us all.

There were moments that my selfishness was overpowering. I was stubborn. My only goal was to win her heart. But in the end, real love triumphed. It was her who steered me through that. It was from Rej that I learned that loving her means prevailing what is best for her.

And what is best for her is to allow God to steer her…to steer her to wherever God wants her straightened and ready. Because all of us here are twisted pilgrims constantly in the process of being straightened to perfection. We are God’s twisted sunshine!


 ~~ OPEN END❤

Erotic engineering

Erotic Engineering

The first time I saw you

It was drawing class

What struck me first was the curve geometry of your ass

Tempting to think that I could gently caress them

The way I carefully assemble my robotic gem

It was during Valentines Day blind date that we finally connect

At that instance we both know our chemistry needs no analytic

Unfortunately it was also deep within Thesis Defense Week

I merely contend you blowing my python while I’m busy coding Python

I was already fueled

ready to show my tensile strength

and unload for mutual combustion        

while imagining your clit reacting in wavy animation

But studies and exams have to come first

Thus, all molecular bindings have to wait

                                    - Mark Francisco (2015)

Feminizing a car - the sexy Peugeot RCZ

A car model so sleek and sexy that it has been buzzing enthusiasts and typical Europeans alike for the past four years is now available in Mindanao many thanks to Peugeot Cagayan de Oro.

To say that the petite Peugeot RCZ could only be driven in the metropolis and suburbia is an understatement though.

Its cuteness can make the driver easily negotiate winding roads, definitely ideal in Mindanao’s unique combination of urban and rural terrain.

Peugeot RCZ originally debuted at the 2007 Frankfurt Auto Show as a prototype but car enthusiasts instantly liked the design that the company hurled the model into production immediately.

Its impressionable features lie both in its interiors and exteriors. The modern, soft material of the dashboard sets the tone. Noble materials elsewhere – a combo of leather, textiles,aluminium and lacquer – impart an air of elegance to this ultra-comfortable sports angel.

On the outside, the two soft humps “double-bubble” roof that taper down gently to the back resemble that of a female cleavage, making the car simply look tempting!

Beyond sexiness, the Peugeot RCZ can surely perform, you bet!

It can accelerate from 0 to 60mph in seven seconds thanks to its 1,600 cc petrol engine that pumps out 156 horses with a six-speed automatic transmission.

Translated into preserving the environment, it strikes the perfect balance between performance, low fuel consumption and reduced CO2 emissions.

Other come-ons of the Peugeot RCZ include its high intensity discharge headlights, halogen bulb foglamps, front LED daytime lights, anti-pinch windows, driver/passenger electronic memory control and JBL HiFi six-speaker audio setup.

Altogether, the Peugeot RCZ combines driving pleasure and comfort with distinctive seductive appeal. Just like a new lover, it exudes nothing but pure automotive emotion. As the German-speaking Austrian manufacturers would describe it, “Herrlich!” Translate that to Cebuano-speaking Cagayanons, “Kalami ug katsada gýud!” or in English,“simply gorgeous!”

Quarry

SATURDAY APRIL 25, 2015

I felt hot. I slowly opened my eyes. This was the first time I opened them. The first vision I had was intense light. I slowly adjusted my eyes around. It was the sun. I was facing up in this plastic bag of water filled with tilapia fingerlings like me. We were restless, wiggling around. Then suddenly some enormous thing slowly released all 70 of us one by one from the plastic bag. And into a bigger body of water that was simply endless. It was the river – the Iponan River to be exact. Of course I wouldn’t know the name of the river because I’m just tilapia. You my dear readers would know it.

But the moment I was released into the colder river, I knew it was right at the mouth. From my tiny viewpoint, I could see Macajalar Bay into the distance. Again, I would not know that particular name obviously. Then we the school of tilapia realized that we must swim upstream because it’s the water of our birth. I didn’t know what collectively made us think of that. Perhaps it was the animal instinct inside. So we swam and we swam, enduring the heat of Summer 2015. At least it was colder here than in that plastic bag.

The water here at Iponan River was distinctly clear. Two years ago, it wasn’t like this. It was chocolate brown. Again, I wouldn’t know any of that. Heck, I wasn’t born yet at the time. And so we continued swimming.

A few hours later as the sun was about to set, I looked above. I saw a bridge filled with people, both pedestrians and motorists inside their vehicles. That turned out to be Barra Bridge. I could hear the people chattering. Of course, they were all gibberish to me. But translated into human language, it would sound like this, “Tin-aw na lagi ang suba, lubog man ni sa una!”

And so we continued swimming. Dusk came. It was my first night in the big wide river. I was scared. We were all scared. Were there predators lurking somewhere? Thankfully, the night passed uneventfully. By dawn, we already reached the San Simon bank. I saw a human lady bathing. A few meters on, I saw another human lady doing the laundry. A few meters more and there were around five boys leisurely soaking.

***

SATURDAY JULY 4, 2015

The rainy days are here, the frogs are croaking in the distance in this Pagalungan riverbank 34.85 kilometers south of the river’s mouth. I have grown to 10 cm long. I can claim that I’m now an adult tilapia ready to spawn. (Nope not the Call of Duty kind, it’s the tilapia kind.) But first, I need a female mate. Uhh…where to find…where to find? Uhuh, there she is! For humans’ sake, I need to call her a name. “Hey ladyfish, can I call you Angelica?” She wiggles back. Oh yeah, you’re my Angelica from now on. Nope, she wiggles away. *Sigh*….I need to court her first. But before that, I need to build a nest to impress her. I instinctively know how to build one – I will form a circular pit in the mud. Suddenly, the whole world shakes. I reflexively swim to the surface and am horrified. It is a huge machine making a whirring sound. I scream.

D Day

PO2 Marc Nadela is navigating his motorcycle downtown on a Sunday negotiating the zigzagging road from the Regional Public Safety Battalion at Upper Gusa where he is currently assigned. He is excited to meet his Facebook chatmate for the first time. For several weeks now, Glenda and Marc have been acquainted on Facebook when Marc was searching for chatmates while resting after duty hours. There have been others of course. There are the flirty ones (as Marc is also a lookee). There are the uber-conservative ones. Marc just loves to junk them. And then there’s a crisscross in between – Glenda. Glenda introduced herself as 21, a saleslady at Gaisano and a resident of Macabalan. So she’s two years younger than me. Kini, Mark thought. Marc instantly likes Glenda. She’s bubbly, she’s a listener, she understands why police officers are passionate about their jobs. That was more than two weeks ago. Finally on this 8^th of February, Marc is being given a pass by his commanding officer to take a break downtown. And so Marc and Glenda decide to meet at the quintessential meeting places of all romantic wannabes – Centrio.

Marc parks his bike, alights and goes immediately to Centrio Garden where according to her phone message, Glenda is waiting. She looks more stunning in person, Marc thought, as a smiling Glenda slowly magnifies in her sight while he’s nearing her. On this lucky occasion, Glenda is also able to secure a rest day on a Sunday, a rarity since mall salesladies are supposed to be on duty on weekends when shoppers abound. Marc and Glenda easily hit it off and walk to the Shrine of the Black Nazarene just across the street in the Recto side, both of them being Catholics, to join in the Mass. After Mass, Marc asks Glenda for a movie date. “Balik ta Centrio ta.” “Ayaw Marc, diri ra ta Gaisano para makatipid ta.” “Nah di ka boringan? Mao ra imo malantawan, kana ra japun imo gi-dutyhan. Centrio rata J” It turns out that the movie shown that pre-Valentine weekend is Fifty Shades of Grey. The two new acquaintances awkwardly giggle and laugh as Christian and Anastasia are making love on screen. After the movie, they decide to have dinner together anywhere but inside a mall to maximize their time. They go to Butcher’s Best at Hayes-Corrales. When you’re with someone so interesting, time easily passes by. Marc needs to go back to camp. Glenda is already being called by her mother, a habit that has persisted since her high school years.

Valentine’s Day passes by with our protagonists not seeing each other. It’s not a day-off for PO2 Nadela. Obviously, it is not a day-off too for Glenda as there are just too many couples hitting off the mall on Valentine’s Day. The two, now lovebirds, continue texting and chatting, waiting for the next day to see each other.

***

WEDNESDAY APRIL 29, 2015 Demolition Day

PO2 Marc Nadela and 30 of his fellow heavily-geared police officers alight from two six-by-six trucks at the Cilrai compound in Macabalan, escorting the demolition team. Then he sees a familiar face in the wave of protesters. It is Glenda.

First of summer

REX has just finished his junior studies at Regional Science High School in Gusa and is now back home enjoying his vacation at Sta. Ana, Tagoloan.

            This summer of 2015, he is looking forward dipping at Sta. Ana river. As he slowly inches towards the middle, he can visibly feel the heat of the summer simmering. The sun is rising to its zenith, dazzling and white like a mirror. And like a mirror breaking, its pieces fall shining and brilliant on the river.

           As Rex is wading the river, he spots someone who is gaily enjoying bathing. That someone looks back and Rex sees a familiar face – Sheila Mae. Fifteen-year-old Sheila Mae is the only child of one of the remaining aristocratic families in Sta. Ana. Their house is the biggest in the village, enclosed with a wall topped with sharp glass shards. Sheila Mae and Rex used to be playmates but they haven’t seen each other after sixth grade when Sheila Mae transferred at an all-girls school in Cebu.

            “Is that you, Rex?”

            “Yeah, it’s me.”

            “Is it very deep there?”

            “Not really,” Rex says, getting up from his kneeling position.

            Seeing that the water barely reaches up to his chest, she continues moving towards him.

       “My, how you’ve grown,” Sheila Mae awkwardly says and for the first time, Rex sees that Sheila Mae’s body is blossoming.

            “Can you teach me how to swim?” Sheila Mae asks Rex.

“Funny that I’ve been here in Sta. Ana all my life and I never know how to swim,” she adds, giggling, her body slightly buoyed up by the current.

“Don’t worry, I’ll teach you how.”

But before he can go further, someone is shouting. It is Doña Celing, Sheila Mae’s mom. Doña Celing is cold and distant, very much unlike her daughter. “Psst….ali na diri, uli nata!”

 “Uhmm…I have to go now,” Sheila Mae says.

“Ok, see you later.”

“I’d rather like it to be sooner,” Sheila Mae smiles and holds Rex’s hand. Rex hasn’t expected this, feeling the petal softness of her fingers.

Later that afternoon, Rex is leisurely humming with his guitar at the front porch of their house.

Then he sees someone coming. It is Doña Celing. For the moment, Rex is ashamed…ashamed of their old house of nipa walls and bamboo flooring.

“You must not see my daughter again,” she suddenly blurts out.

Stunned, Rex answers back, “But what have I done wrong, ma’am?”

“Because you are playing with my daughter. For that, I have decided to cut short Sheila Mae’s vacation here and let her spend the rest of the summer back in Cebu,” Doña Celing points out.

Feeling betrayed, Rex searches for some sympathy on Doña Celing’s face but he sees only anger. He dizzyingly runs back to the house and into his room, locking the door. For he can slowly feel a hard lump choking his throat.

It is getting dusk and Rex opens the window in his room and stares straight towards his rich neighbor across the street and sees the lights in Sheila Mae’s room as Urbandub's iconic song is played. 

Parked car

This night sky

Makes city lights shine like diamonds

Our song plays on the radio

Whoa, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh

For a brief moment, Rex smiles. Then the lights start to blur as the tears, stinging, finally come.

I am just popcorn

ENDING up in a toilet bowl in Bulua would’ve hardly come as a surprise. But it still did to me considering the amazing things that I’ve been through. You see, I started out as a seed – yes, a mere popcorn seed in a plantation in Calhoun County, Iowa. For seven days, I was pampered like a human baby in the womb. It was the moisture of the soil such as nitrogen, phosphate and potash which caused me to germinate and emerge after ten days. Then sugar from my leaves eventually caused me to grow ears of popcorn.

Once I was ripe for harvesting, we kernels were separated from the cob and stored for eight more months until we were ready to be processed as popcorn. First, we were cleaned using a vibrator to remove small pieces of the cob that we used to be attached onto. Then we were polished and put inside a huge bag for bulk distribution. We were loaded into a huge cargo rig ready to travel 110 miles onto Des Moines Airport. At the airport, we were roughly pushed along with other bags onto several planes. Some of my batchmates would eventually wind up in India, others in Mexico. The bag I was in was destined to Manila, the Philippines and we had to endure the long 16-hour flight in the cargo plane.

In Manila, we were separated into smaller bags, where others would eventually go to other domestic destinations. As for my batchmate kernels, we were loaded onto a smaller van straight into a RORO vessel bound for Cagayan de Oro where we spent an overnight trip in the ferry. Docking at Macabalan port the next day, we were then repacked into still smaller bags. Some of my batchmates would eventually end up in Bukidnon, others in Naawan. As for me, I was destined to be sold at Gaisano Cinema.

February 12, 2015. The popular erotica Fifty Shades of Grey was opening that day. In anticipation of the deluge of customers, hundreds of us kernels were cramped in a heater. At a temperature of 180 degrees Celsius, the starch inside me gelatinized, softened and expanded into an airy foam. Upon cooling down, I became your edible popcorn where I was mixed with cheese. Since I was at the bottom of the heater, it was not until the last full show that I was picked up and put with dozen others into a bag into the waiting arms of a moviegoing trio – Mark, Stella and a third wheel. With Stella seated in center, she decided to put the popcorn bag in her lap so her two companions could easily reach out for us the popcorn.

While Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey were making love on screen, I could easily feel the slowing tightness of Stella’s upper thighs. It almost removed the air out of me. Then Mark came to pick me up. I was thrown inside his digestive system – one hour in the stomach, another hour in the small intestine and 12 hours in the large intestine, exiting into the toilet bowl thereafter.

My next destination? The sewers. Because I am just popcorn. As for the human who consumed me, he would continue living and loving, hoping that Stella or someone else would become his Anastasia Steele.